My beloved wife ... Always in my mind. Forever in my heart.

My beloved wife ...

My heart my mind is full of 'pictures', full of memories. Every day, every minute with you was a gift, wonderful and irreplaceable.

two sunflower at a fairfaced rough-hewed brickwork
When we talked I most often used the German nickname 'Schatz' - the English expression 'darling'  is not the right equivalent  -  as you were 'my precious'   ... valuable, unique, wonderful - my one and only - you meant the world to me. 

Your eyes like the deep, blue sky and your smile like the rising of the sun for me. 

When I first held you in my arms, I hoped that moment would last until the end of time, and now I'm standing here and starting to realize that fate only gave us little bit more than 2 decades.


I remember all the songs we listened, the movies we saw, the books we read to each other ... Goodbye my love, goodbye because I know we will meet again. 

Help me to find the strength to do the right thing, I love you to the end of my days and I know that you will then be waiting for me there with our horses, dogs and cats and I am already looking forward to being with you.

I bear in mind so many happy moments - happy moments which I had with you  - I carry these moments in my heart - by these feeling you are always with me.

I try to do something positive – I socialize more… but deep down I know the truth. An entire world of people can never replace you.


Hurt  -  Johnny Cash

I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything
What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
I wear this crown of thorns
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time
The feelings disappear
You are someone else
I am still right here
What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way


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