Mental Health - Widower Experience (WX)

As we move through life, we have to except, understand and learn that there are many things out of our control. We can’t choose so many things that happen in the world around us - things out of our control. One thing that we can control is who our friends are, and this decision can either make our lives so much richer and beautiful, or more stressful and disappointing. Today I’ll focus on friendship. Friendship makes life more enjoyable and enriches one's everyday experiences. Everyone is wired differently and brings their own personality and history to a friendship. Some friendships develop quickly and some take time. In order to recognize and feel a real friendship, qualities like  Accepting the other - Acceptance is the ability to see that others have a right to be their own unique persons. That means having a right to their own feelings, thoughts and opinions. When you accept people for who they are, you let go of your desire to change them.  Unwavering support -...

My stoic mantra ... Go as far as you can. When you get there You will see how it goes on. Your path and purpose will become clear and become yours - when you begin to trust yourself. The path - your path is the destination. Live your life for you with self-awareness, trust und confidence You have to trust in yourself - trust in something - your gut, destiny, life, karma, good in others ... whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life. When you look to the past, don't sit and dwell on your regrets. Instead, focus on the things you learned from each experience and how they may enrich your future. Use the past not as something to hold you back, but as a method for reaffirming the drive to move forward on your chosen path. Live your life for you and not to please expectations Social pressure is deceiving - we all become influenced without noticing it. Before we realize we lost control of our lives, we end up envying how other people li...

As I have written so much about grief and lost - and about challenges in life - I like to write today about the most valuable emotion. The emotion which causes the pain of grieving ...  LOVE  Today is Thanksgiving - Thanks are given to those who do something good for us. So, it is the best day to say thanks to our beloved ones, who makes your life beautiful by spreading love. We say Thank You to everyone in our ordinary life, but some people are special, our beloved partner, and I do it as well and I say thank you to my wife who went ahead over the bridge and is waiting on the other side. I think Thanksgiving is a good day to think about Love. I already wrote about it before that I see that grief is love . And yes, I understand that one or two may not believe me, because grief seems like a nightmare. I have to admit that on few days I don’t believe it myself, but then someone says something tender or shares a loving memory or does something supportive for another person and I’...

Trust is the basement, the pillars and the roof for oneself and for relations. Trust builds relationship and holds relationship together. Trust goes hand in hand with the integrity of the partners and is what makes a meaningful and confident relationship. Self-trust is trusting blindly, trusting implicitly oneself - stopping to questioning oneself - starts with understanding and goes on with believing in oneself. Trust in a relationship is similar from my viewpoint - Trust is like putting a part of yourself in someone else's hands. Therefore, it is difficult for some people to gain trust in friendship or relationship.  I am sure I don't have to go into any detail or example - as sometimes we experience disappointments or betrayals - when this happens, we lose faith. I firmly believe that we have to trust in us and others, otherwise a good life and relationship becomes impossible or so hard that life becomes only existence. It leads me to conclude that sincere, trusting b...

Self-determination, self-definition, autonomy is not only a community, public, social spirit or topic or only for society, but also for each and every one of us. Especially when it comes to going your own way - living your own life - realizing your own meaning in life. enjoying your and using your freedom. And what I like to emphasize is that the freedom I mean has nothing to do with not being aware of others, seeing others or even when I see it here or there - it has nothing to do with absence or non-recognition of authority or other, or even anarchy or the ruthless living out of all desires. Quite the contrary I have in mind- it has to do with responsible action as well as consideration and respect for ourselves and others. Freedom also challenges us to make the best of our circumstances, to choose from the multitude of possibilities to go our own meaningful path and to live your life. Even more it has something to do with building bricks, concrete for a stabile basement, wa...

I already mentioned here and there in my articles that I am thinking in pictures. Depending on the context - when I am thinking about trust, confidence, faith, trustfulness, and resilience - I do have trees in my mind. It might sound strange or crazy - but perhaps you can understand it in a metaphorical sense - when I say a forest is like a group of people and trees like brothers and sisters. And an appropriate image to symbolize humanity: We too stand tall on this earth and stretch our arms to heaven. At the same time, trees make us aware of how small, fading and partly changing a person's lifespan is. Trees can connect us to time and the horizon. Trees give us a sense of timelessness and connect us to the past. The tree in the changing of the seasons symbolizes our own life story of becoming and passing away. For me, trees have always been a kind of / or mixture of a companion, calm anchor or call it guardian. In the highest crowns of trees, the world rustles, their roots rest st...

The world is full of challenges - Uncertainty is a part of life and it can’t be avoided. The best way to deal with it is to learn techniques that help you live with it, without the accompanying worry.  Against all challenges and odds, and as well in times of troubles the good and beautiful things are all to often in front of us - we can see them, we can feel, we can hear them - we can perceive the good and beauty by our senses. But what I learned, more through crises than from good times, that the best and most beautiful things in our world are often not seen or heard, but felt deep, very deep in our hearts. Honesty and trust are the cornerstones of life. They are the most essential ingredients and the foundational principles that holds all relationships. But I firmly believe - as I learned it for myself - not only relations. An important is as well that you are honest to yourself and that you trust yourself. Being honest with yourself requires self-awareness and even courage. It c...