Mental Health - Widower Experience (WX)

The movie "The Room Next Door" by Almodóvar offers a captivating story that captivates the viewer from beginning to end - at least it did for me - by the way, I watched the movie in its original version - but this will not make a difference for the German version. With a phenomenal cast including Tilda Swinton and Julianne Moore, impressive visuals, and a gripping plot, this movie is an unforgettable cinema experience, which I had. From Almodóvar's "The Room Next Door," I take away the essence that life is fleeting, fragile, but can also be 'breaking,' full of beauty and connections to things, experiences, and above all to other people. This movie invites us and everyone to become aware of our own vulnerability and to appreciate the importance of deep human relationships. It also reminds us, at least it does for me, that it is never too late to seek reconciliation and restore connections with old friends or loved ones. It reminds us to appreciate the pre...

I like to start this blog post with an image which shows the joy of life ... 'Assisted dying is not about giving up. In fact, it's about reclaiming control. It's not about death. It's about dignity.' 'It's about giving people the right to end their suffering on their own terms, with compassion and respect.' 'So as you watch this, I am dead. But you watching this could help change the laws around assisted dying.' Paola Marra, a 53-year-old cancer patient, passed away at the Dignitas clinic in Switzerland following a struggle with breast and bowel cancer. Before her death, she implored politicians to reconsider the UK’s laws on assisted dying, which she described as cruel. She shared an open letter and a film, explaining why she opted for assisted death and stated the current laws forced individuals to endure excruciating suffering or pay significant amounts to travel to Dignitas. Although widely banned in the UK, assisted dying campaigns are incre...

Suicides, considering suicides or dying with dignity and medical assisted in dying cover everyone from young to old, rich to poor. It cuts across religions, cultures, genders, income levels, and geography. The bandwidth of people, situations, reasons, side-effects and and and ...  There are no real shared similar and for sure not unique patterns from when the suicide is thought of to the point it is attempted. For some people, suicide is an impulsive response to life challenges, such as losing a loved one, a job, a setback, or another substantial challenge. In a number of cases, suicide ideation and thoughts grow over time, especially for someone with a mental health disorder like anxiety or depression and as well people with a life of suffering and walked through hell (pain and / or mental suffering). The burden of these conditions and challenges of life may lead them into thinking of suicide or dying in dignity. Whatever the process that leads to end one's life is, the effec...

 My wife could die in dignity one and a half year ago. "This is my way, my will and my decision," my wife has mention over and over again over the past few days before she passed away on her own will. And she said as well: "I love life, I only wish I could live it, but I'm trapped with everything I have in my body - a body that I can't move anymore, a body that only others can touch, move, wash, ... - it's so degrading to me"  And one of her last sentences were: "See you on the other side." In the following video, Esther used almost the same words: “This is my story, my journey and my choice,” “I love life, I just wish I could live it.” "See you on the other side." In October 2020, two-thirds of New Zealanders voted in a referendum to enact the End of Life Choice Act. However, it will still take around 12 months for the law to come into force in November 2021. Euthanasia has been legal in New Zealand since and people can apply for it,...

Now more than half a year after my wife left / died with dignity. I learned for myself how to see grief - this is certainly not generally applicable, but maybe one or two will find their way to deal with grieving and mourning. Grief is the visibility, feeling of love, often a huge deep love for a person who died, a beloved one who has gone and is no longer tangible. Love stays and.... Bang! Pow! ... the other one of your love is gone - but love remains. One feels the love / is even more overflowing with love than before.  The longer you are with another person, love changes into a very strong fabric / structure of trust, respect, cohesion and emotional chaos. When the other person is gone, the emotional chaos remains and unexpectedly and out of the blue this 'love' is back - back in your heart and in every part of your body. But what now? Now there was no one left to say that you love the other! No one else is around - to whom you can give or show this love! I was told I could ...

When and why a person perceives their life as bearable or even successful, or when and why one would rather want to be dead, cannot generally defined or is  generally applicable or universally valid and true for each and everyone - the answer is unique - and that makes it complicate - but anyway decisions about dead or alive are and should be never easy. There are people, who have already killed themselves - who in the opinion of most other people, did not have the slightest reason for it - while on the other hand many seriously ill and severely disabled people fight tenaciously for their lives or for a better quality of life.  Obviously, whether a life is worth living depends not only on external, universal, or objective factors - not only I am a firm believer and fighter for individual attitudes, behavior and thinking how someone want to live their life but as well when they want to end it / pull the ripcord. Anyone whoever thought about themself, about their life, all ...

While I am getting older, I become more aware of the rarity of opportunities, the opportunity to enjoy, admire the uniqueness and exquisiteness of beauty, and to see the beauty among rubble / in the midst of the 'noise of everyday life'. With each advancing decade, nature’s beauty and the magnificence of life increasingly amazes me.  Maturation allows us to enjoy and appreciate the spring of life and the youth and to inventory the knowledge garnered from rainy and showery, from hot and dry summer times, and also great and joyful times reflecting upon adulthood’s long pull.  Ageing allows us to free ourselves from the strife and as well attempt, aspiration, and ambition of our younger self - but this is not to say that it is over when you are older. Thoughtfulness, reflectiveness and also respectful and appreciative self-doubt, self criticism nurtures the cherished milk of wisdom.  Every day is a good day - a good time to embrace learning at all stages of life.  Life ...